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Author Topic: Chiggs Chiggli, Businessman - Killed in Yachting Accident.  (Read 17579 times)

Offline Exen'Chiggli

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Chiggs Chiggli, Businessman - Killed in Yachting Accident.
« on: December 20, 2011, 01:28:21 AM »
Famous galactic entrepreneur businessman, movie director, actor, singer, photoshoot model and poet, Chiggs Chiggli the Third, died yesterday in a freak yachting accident.

Mr.Chiggli, the Sullust trillionaire owner of various businesses inherited from his father, died after crashing his yacht into an Ithorian herdship. Mr.Chiggli lost control whilst simultaneously trying to pilot the vessel and making love to his fifteenth wife, talentless reality holo-star Lim Lardashian.

Clean up crews are apparently still busy attempting to scrape the frozen chocolate off of the herdship's hull, that iced the moment Mr.Chiggli's chocolate filled hot-tub was exposed to the vacuum of space.

Mr.Chiggli's extensive wardrobe was also vented during the crash, and many items of clothing continued at faster than the speed of light into the Corellian arm - causing traffic chaos for thousands of light years. One corellian freighter was apparently destroyed when one of Mr.Chiggli's thongs hit the vehicle with its shields down - vaporizing both it and its passengers.

Reaction has been varied - from huge outpourings of mourning on Coruscant, especially the Chiggs Chiggli fanclub TM (owned and operated by Chiggli and Chiggli Industries) - to the joyous celebrations on both the planets of Kashyyyk, (where Wookiee slaves were kept in sweat huts, in order to collect it for Mr.Chiggli's "WookieeMusk TM" range of cologne), to Mon Calamari, whereby the production line of producing eggs for his "Mon Calamarian Caviar" range has ceased amongst the stirrings of revolution.

Mr.Chiggli was last heard of in public fighting a bitter legal battle with the Imperials over ownership of his multi-conglomerate business empire.

Mr.Chiggli's legacy will be for future generations to decide, but until then - traffic reports are on high alert in the Corellian arm.

Hyperspace navigation charts will be updated the moment investigators uncover just how many nipple-clamps and g-strings were vented into space.
« Last Edit: December 20, 2011, 01:51:43 AM by Exen'Chiggli »

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